Shall We Romance?

I know it's almost 2 am. But I am wide awake. So let's talk romance. We all crave it. I crave it. I think it's vital. I think without it, our minds wander. Our natural impulse is to find it, recover it, discover it. If it's not in our lives, we look for it in books, movies, plays, music, other people, our friends, our celebrities. I think we all love a great romance story. And we also love the great romantic failures too. We tend to love it when celebrity couples break up as much as, if not more than, when we see them fall in love. So sometimes I wonder, do I enjoy the big romantic failures of my life?

I have some great stories, some stories that are difficult to believe really happened. I've met a lot of men with situations that required a lot of patience and understanding. Sometimes I question my sanity. Sometimes I question theirs. Sometimes I think that I must look for complicated situations that will keep my life from being static. What each of my relationships have in common is romance. There was always some big romantic gesture or beginning to most of them. And each man caught me up in the idea that I was in the most romantic of all possibilities. At least in the beginning.

I don't know if I'm a sucker or if I really made men fall madly in love with me. I wonder if, like my first love (from high school) said, I just give off pheromones that draw certain men to me. And I am definitely a sucker for compliments. I love it when a guy tells me I'm stunning, or gorgeous or exquisite. I love being told I am one of a kind. I crave that feeling of being unique, of being the only woman for this man. Of being the Rita Hayworth in a sea of Tori Spellings.

Of being a woman who has it all.

Funny, beautiful, smart, sexy, successful, creative. A great conversationalist, the nurturer, the supporter, the best friend...the amazing lover.

When I start to feel like a man thinks these things about me, I'm hooked. I feel like finally, I found a guy who gets it. A guy who will always appreciate me and never take me for granted. And I want these same characteristics in my guy. So when we are both feeling this way it paves the way for a big romance.

So how long is the romance supposed to last? I'm hoping as long as possible. I'm not looking for a bouquet of sunflowers every day or jewelry on every important occasion. But I think it's important to hear often, that you are beautiful, sexy, smart...incredible. It doesn't have to be vocally, it can be a simple as a back rub after a long day, or being given the last french fry or taking you to a movie or concert, he knows you'll love, even if he knows he won't.

And the ladies have to be romantic as well. Men crave it too, just maybe not as frequently or to the same degree. But I think it's a two-way street. You gotta give to get and you gotta keep it going and not let it die.

And a lot of the times, it does die. I'm not sure it's something you can totally prevent. I do think certain relationships have a romance expiration date. And some can be put in the fridge and kept longer and some go bad only after a few days on the shelf. And maybe, just maybe, some will last forever.

More stories to come...